Overcoming Perfection

and why nothing worth doing is ever easy


Things have been a bit quiet here in over the past month or so. My first instinct is to tell you that my business is going through a bit of a transition. And while that's true, it's not really accurate, because my business is always going through a transition. I'm always thinking about what I can be doing better, what's working and what isn't, and I'm always looking ahead to new goals or dreams. But it can be scary saying those things out loud sometimes. It can even be scary just trying something new. But I've never shied away from talking about the hard things here, and I don't want to start now.

This morning I had someone I don't even know write something unkind on a Facebook post, and then that person took the time to email me directly about it. It was a pretty shit start to my day, and I can't seem to shake it. I've had this sort of thing happen before and it's never bothered me as much, but this one is really getting to me. And I think the reason why is because I am trying some new things. And in that newness, I'm feeling a little tender and raw, and a little unsure of myself still.

And isn't it that the unkind comments said to us when we are at our most vulnerable, the ones that we unfortunately hear the loudest? 

If you're in business, or if you've ever just put your work out there, you likely have felt this feeling. It could have been from a relative who doesn't understand, a friend who didn't mean to be unkind, or it could have been from a rude, nameless internet stranger who seems to have forgotten that there are real people on the other side of the screen. In any case, I doubt I'm alone here, which is why I'm writing about it rather than just ignoring it like I usually do.

They say that if you want different results, you have to try something different. Which is so very true. But they don't mention that sometimes those results aren't all good. That sometimes there are unintended negative consequences, or people who don't get it, that show up as well. I really struggle with those things. I want to do everything perfectly, right from the start, even though I know how unrealistic that is. And I want everyone to like what I do. That's human nature. But it's not possible, and it's not good for me to keep trying to hit that unrealistic goal.

I know that some of you are trying new things. That you have big plans for your work in the coming months. And I unfortunately know that the path you'll take to get there won't be all unicorns and kittens. That there will be struggle - most of it invisible to the rest of us, which means it's harder for us to see it and support you.

So I want you to know that it happens to all of us. We all have those dips in confidence, the times we second guess what we're doing, and the moments where we just feel like throwing in the towel. But nothing worth doing is easy. And I'm holding onto that today, and if you needed to hear it, I hope you are too.